#and therefore treating whatever the relevant marginalized identity is as like a big serious elephant in the room that cannot be acknowledge | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

faggotry-enjoyer · 11 months ago

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there's obviously a lot more to it but i think a decent litmus test to gauge how you're doing with regard to being socially safe for people in a given marginalized group to be around is how you react to their humor. do you take lighthearted ribbing of the majority outgroup as a personal offense? do you immediately close off if they joke about their oppression or lighthearted self-deprecation based on relevant stereotypes or tropes? or are you, yknow, chill about it? are you okay with not always being in on the joke?

#idk like in my experience my favorite cishet people are the ones who laugh at my gay jokes or even join in depending on the vibe #i appreciate it when thin people don't treat my fat jokes as self deprecating #i love it when friends treat my disability as something neutral that can be joked about rather than a Big Deal #like obviously dynamics are going to vary widely and not all laughter is the same #e.g. if one of my jewish friends makes a joke about her mom working in finance (real example)#and i laugh bc she had excellent comedic delivery #that's very different than it would be if i was laughing bc i agreed with the antisemitic trope she was poking fun at #the latter vibe i think i've heard described as 'laughter with a mouth full of blood'#and that should be avoided #but there's something to be said for not being so scared of that that you end up needlessly walking on eggshells #and therefore treating whatever the relevant marginalized identity is as like a big serious elephant in the room that cannot be acknowledge #if that makes sense #does this make sense?#faggotry enjoyer original

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